Its so ironic that with all the stuff i've been trying to do, i'm back to square one. All the talk about changing the way i live my life, and changing my perception of things and all, changing the way i look at things, changing the way i talk to people, changing the way i regard people, i'm still plain old Dominic. And i still need a blog to pour out my true feelings. I feel so bloody alone.

These days, i feel like im so fake. Its like my whole life is just one big show. And it seems like i am the only one who can see it. And i have no idea when it will all stop.

I long for a person whom i will be able to pour everything out to with out editing out all the fucked up loserish things i have done. Unfortunately, i dont think it will ever happen. I'm just too scared that i will lose the respect i have earned from people. I have no idea what made me so shallow. I try to forget all those things, but i guess it seems like it will always come back to haunt me.

See, im even scared to post them on a blog that noone else reads. Fucking loser.

Why has my image become so important to me? Is it because i am afraid of the consequences of giving people a bad image of me? Or is it something else? That im just insecure about myself? I have no fucking idea, and im starting to type crap nonsense so i'll just end here, and go take a walk.